Table Settings and Table manners – A Guideline

Table settings depends on the menu and the number of courses but the basic setting is a fork and two knives. Add a pudding spoon – and for dessert pastries you'll need a fork too. If the main course is meat or steak you may want to lay a serrated knife. For fish meals, the more traditional fish knives and forks have now been largely dropped from modem place settings. For pudding, the spoon and fork can go above the place setting with the fork underneath and its handle to the left and the spoon on top with its handle to the right. The soup spoon goes on the outside right-hand side. The butter knife should be laid either on the place setting or directly on the side plate. In more formal place settings, as our mums told us, always work from the outside in. In that case, the bread knife will be on the outside. Don't get too fussed about table settings, but at least try to have a fork and two knives.

With table settings, the water glass is normally laid closest to the knife tip, then the white wine glass, then the red wine glass either in a triangle or a line. If there is a whole line of glasses, you know you're in for a good night!

Break bread rolls rather than cutting them. Tilt the bowl away from you when eating soup from an old-fashioned, shallow soup plate. Leaving your fork and knife crossed in the centre of your plate indicates that you haven't finished - when placed together in the centre of the plate this indicates you've finished. Don't pick up your potato on a fork and peel it obviously; do this discreetly. Once upon a time, instead of being allowed to ask for salt and pepper, one had to offer it to one's neighbour and hopefully the penny would drop that you actually needed it yourself. And then of course there are afternoon tea manners but that's more for history books. Always try to be considerate and anticipate your neighbours' needs.

Serve a finger bowl with foods that need to be eaten with the fingers, such as sweet corn, quail, whole prawns or globe artichokes. Fill a small bowl with warm water and add a slice of lemon, and rose petals if you want. When you have finished nibbling the delicious morsels, dip your fingers into the bowl and dry discreetly on your napkin. And of course don't speak with your mouth full. Many sophisticated elegantly dressed person lets themselves down with bad manners. And don't put your elbows on the table until you're an auntie! Be restrained and don't pile one food on top of another - it's an insult to the cook to be overly greedy and then leave food on the plate.

Don't clear the table until everyone's finished eating. Clear discreetly and from the left (serve from the right). Hold the plate on your hand resting on the three middle fingers, secured by the thumb and little finger; place the fork upside down and slide the knife underneath. Place the next plate on your wrist where palm meets arm, and stack plates there. Clear debris discreetly to the lower plate. Stack up to three or four plates.

Always remember that the table settings described above are only guidelines - there are no rules cast in stone and the traditional table settings are regarded by some as old fashioned and snobish.

Table settings from Amazon

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